Therapy
by Cronomon
Summary: And, unfortunately, Shirayuki drew the shortest straw.


Therapy

"So… can you tell me why you're here?"

"Yup."

"Why are you here?"

"Because the others pulled a sneak attack on me, tied me up while I was unconscious, then dumped me here with you."

"Okay. That's one answer. Now, can you tell me why they did it?"

"How the hell should I know?"

"Guess."

"Because they're mental."

"Because they're mental. Maybe. Is there any other reason you can think of?"

"No."

"Are you sure? Think hard."

"… I get the feeling you're trying to tell me something."

"What do you think I'm trying to tell you?"

"That it isn't totally random that I'm stuck here, tied up and lying on the ground, while you're on that chair writing down everything I'm saying in that little notebook you're holding."

"Good answer. So if it isn't totally random, then why do you think you're here? Tied up and lying on the ground while I'm on this chair writing down everything you're saying in this little notebook."

"I dunno. The others want us to hook up? Ow!"

"Did that hurt?"

"Well, considering it just friggin' hit me in the eye, yes!"

"Good. Now can you toss it back? I do need that pencil."

"I'm tied up. How the hell would I be able to get it?"

"It's right there in front of you."

"… Are you freaking kidding me?! I'm not a dog!"

"Fine, I'll get it myself."

"…"

"Okay, I've got it. Now then, let's get back on topic. Why do you think the others knocked you out and brought you here?"

"Well, if it's not for us to find what we have in common and then start going out, then I have no idea."

"Think, Kazeshini. Think hard. The others dumped you here with me, and I'm asking you questions while writing down your answers in a notebook."

"…"

"Kazeshini?"

"Wait a minute... is this _therapy_? Why the hell am I taking friggin' therapy? I don't need therapy! Untie me right now, Shirayuki, _right now_! I'm gonna go show those bastards a piece of my mind."

"Good job finding out. So, why do you think the others wanted you to take therapy?"

"Are you listening to me? I said untie me! Untie me!"

"Not until you answer the question."

"Grrrrr… fine. I don't know. I don't know why the hell I need to take therapy, much less from a therapist like you. Throwing pencils at the patient. You're not very good at this, Shirayuki."

"Okay. Thank you. Anyways, because I am losing my patience with you, I'll just tell you why you're here. You're here because everyone is tired of your attitude. No one appreciates a bloodthirsty, selfish, whiny maniac, Kazeshini."

"I-."

We've all heard about how you were neglected so harshly by your master, and how badly you want to rip him to shreds without mercy. And none of us are very happy about your short temper. So we all drew straws on who had to be your therapist, and I drew the shortest one. That, Kazeshini, is why you are here."

"… No need to be so harsh about it."

"Anyways, it's my job to see to it that you calm down a little. So tell me, why are you so easily angered?"

"It's just how I am. What, do you have a problem with it?"

"Somewhat. You see, it's because of your short temper that most of us are afraid of you."

"Good, I want them to be."

"Do you now? Okay then. Could you at least refrain from constantly speaking of Hisagi in such a rude manner? You have no idea how many times Katen Kyokotsu has complained about you using such vile language in front of the twins."

"Well, she's one to talk. I mean, have you ever _seen_ her drunk?"

"You're getting off topic. Could you answer the question?"

"Oh yeah, the question. Well, it depends. Could the others stop talking about their own wielders and how they're beginning to second-guess themselves?"

"Alright. Would it be too much to ask if I requested that you stop reacting physically if something offends you? You nearly broke Gonryomaru's arm the other night."

"Che. That bastard had it coming. Lying and saying that he fought a mountain lion once. A kitten could've brought that guy to his knees!"

"Again, you're getting off topic. The question?"

"Again, it depends. Could the others stop spewing out crap all the time?"

"…"

"Oi, Shirayuki, you okay? You look kinda… annoyed."

"Oh, do I? I wonder why."

"Well, when you finally come up with a reason, just tell me."

"Kazeshini, you are the most infuriating, self-absorbed, arrogant, agitating, cocky, too-proud-for-your-own-good bastard."

"Thanks, that makes me feel so warm and cuddly inside."

"Shut up! I can't take this anymore- are you being so uncooperative on purpose?"

"Maybe~"

"_Kazeshini_! I hate you so much right now."

"Aw, come on. Just a few minutes ago you were being all calm."

"I'm just a really good actress."

"Now who's the cocky bitch?"

"…"

"OW! OWWW! OWOWOWOWOW! Oh, God, lady, what're you trying to do? Kill me?"

"That would be nice."

"… Can you untie me now?"

"No. In fact, I think I'll go have some lunch."

"What? Hey, Shirayuki, where're you going? You're not just gonna leave me here, are you?"

"Watch me."

"Shirayuki!"

"…"

"So… how about that date? Shirayuki?"

"..."

"Aw, dammit."


End file.
